Article | Onlythebeat

This Weekend in SF 2.26.2016

As a Chicago native, I’ve often complained that we suffer from the high class problem of having too much to do on any given weekend. Then I came back to San Francisco for a few weeks after an 8 month hiatus and was instantly reminded of why I came back to Chicago “to chill out.” From a mainstream perspective, every city has its douchy “upscale” places where you can find lawyers, investment bankers, and accountants “throwing money at the problem” with bottle service, dress codes, and lines that move according to their length rather than capacity inside. San Francisco is no exception to this rule. If you enjoy Bottled Blonde and Parliament in Chicago, hit up Playland or Stock in Trade, and you’ll feel right at home. If you like TheMID, then you’ll LOVE Ruby Skye. In both cities, these types of venues afford a diverse selection of beautiful young bottle rats selling their souls - all to the tune of top 40 DJ’s doing the same. For those of us who have taste in music and don’t need money to get the girls, the underground here in SF dwarfs Chicago. As you’ll see below, the sheer number of events and parties going on in any given weekend would seem to indicate that the proper approach to this city is no different from a large festival. You know, get really fucked up and see where the night takes you. This is not the correct approach to navigating the underground here, however. More is not always better, and there are blind alleys at every turn. Unlike Chicago, this place is neither friendly nor is it very forgiving. What makes the Golden Gate city so treacherous is that the holier-than-thou attitude of the mainstream clubs tend to permeate its way even into the underground. A number of places are just a little bit too cool for their own good. And yes, I’m calling you out by name and address on a website that is viewed by thousands of people every day, Venue 550 located at 150 San Bruno Ave. I hope you miserable pricks get shut down. With so much noise, I've taken it upon myself to deliver a clear signal for anyone who is in the Bay Area and wants to have a good time this weekend. They're sorted by time, then by the likelihood I have of showing up.

Thursday (2/25)


Welcoming me to the Golden Gate City, the folks at Touch of Us have been kind enough to ask me to headline their weekly Thursday party hosted at Underground SF. I think it goes without saying that this will be a good time. The Talent: IMJUSTINBRAUN with support by Dao & Pwny and Bob & One A The Venue: Underground SF - 424 Haight St The Time: 10:00 PM - 2:00 AM The Deal: No Cover, no dress code 12743933_10207312218257608_1807537088193842277_n

Friday (2/26)

Dirtybird Quarterly

Claude Vonstroke and his rowdy gang of fun-loving, hard-partying, bass-driven - look dudes I don't even want to write about this anymore. Anyone who has read my articles will know that I've beaten this bird with a bat so fucking hard that I'm still picking feathers out of my gear. You know what to expect. It's never a dull moment. Tickets are at the door. If I don't see you there I won't even notice because I will be on the floor cutting a rug. Also, your excuse better be that you're too busy seeing Justin Jay in Santa Barbara. The Talent: Claude Vonstroke, Justin Martin, Christian Martin, J. Phlip, Worthy, Ardalan. The Venue: MEZZANINE 444 Jessie St, San Francisco, California 94103 The Time: 8:00 PM - 4:00 AM The Deal: No dress code. $15 at the door before 11:00PM, $20 afterwards. Tickets cannot be purchased online so get there early. 12745461_877460579017861_8204245989105743659_n

Allllllllllll Night!

Okay so remember how early on I said that San Francisco is notable for thinking it's way cooler than it really is? The people who organize this party are actually cool. If you are ever new in town or stopping by, the Mioli Music crew are hands-down the best people to guide you through the Bay Area underground. They hosted me last week at Monarch SF where we threw a seriously awesome party together. I've attended three of their parties in the past week, each one more fun than the previous. The crowd they attract is so lighthearted and friendly that I often have to pinch myself and remember that this is still not the Midwest. The Talent: emanate, Dem Suckaz, Louis B2B Javier Fabian, Sepehr, DJ Spacecamp B2B Tronic, Flashflooder The Venue: Undisclosed The Time: 11:00 PM - LATE The Deal: Tickets at the door. $10 before midnight, $20 after. Come as you are. 12747427_1175018359183995_8069047117977915092_o

Saturday (2/27)

Cuddles & Bass

I had the pleasure of meeting bjor in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico this January during BPM Festival. We both played at the Coco Maya Beach Club on different days. While we were partying together, he mentioned that his burning man camp was throwing a teddy-bear themed party at the tail end of February and invited me to check it out. I'll be honest, I was skeptical. Anyone who throws a party full of teddy bears might have a hard time keeping up with my following. A trial by fire was in order. When Hernán Cortés first arrived in Mexico, his first order of business was to burn his ships to the ground. He did this to send a message to his men that they had no choice but to make it in the new world. After I'd finished my final set in Playa Del Carmen, my approach to partying the rest of the trip away could only be described as very traditional. At the end of that festive ship-burning, bjor was one of the few left standing. Teddy, set, go!! The Talent: bjor, Dude Skywalker The Venue: Tank 18 - 1345 Howard St San Francisco, CA 94103 The Time: 8:00 PM - 4:00 AM The Deal: Doors open at 8. Shoes will have to be checked. Tickets can be purchased here. 7c7ffd63-4346-43ff-a92f-17d0f86f177c

DeMentha Does SF

A mutual friend introduced me to Yaz over a year ago. Since then I have met at least a thousand people, one in five of which knows him. This wouldn't be notable if it wasn't for the simple fact that I get around. It doesn't matter what geographic region, social group, race, gender, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status.... somebody knows fucking Yaz! His party this Saturday is alongside of his burning man camp that I admittedly am unfamiliar with. I will be making a point to stop by and hear him drop some science. The Talent: Beta, The General, Tariq, Yaz, Founding Father The Venue: Black Hammer Brewing - 544 Byrant St. The Time: 8:00 PM - Close The Deal: The event is FREE w/ RSVP. The venue does have limited capacity, so please arrive early to ensure entry. RSVP via the Facebook event page. 12779021_10153937571092421_1426468684330437272_o


I played with Nathan Cabreana this past Thursday at Monarch SF. Dude can throw down. For those of you who missed him on Thursday, you can catch him this Saturday at WISH Bar and Lounge. The Talent: Dalen Poland, Nathan Cabreana The Venue: WISH Bar and Lounge - 1539 Folsom St The Time: 10:00 PM - 2:00 AM The Deal: Doors open at 10. 12734121_10208706140231588_8565788692643288365_n Headline Photographer Credit: Andy Mai